Missing Rosebud, Switching Lanes, Equalizing Entropy

Missing Rosebud

The trusty SUV ambled up an incline and I’m lucky there are no approaching cars.Falling Off A Cliff

Two rights followed by two lefts. R-R-L-L. How hard could it be? I’ve been here so many times, sitting on the passenger’s seat, there’s no way I can screw this up.

Nice house.

I haven’t seen that one before.


I don’t remember this curb.

Where on earth is the club house?

Dang it.

I should be on Melissa Street right about now.

I don’t recall there were these many blind curves.

Where’s that bougainvillea bush I always see when we make a left?


I make a slow, calculated u-turn and retrace my route.

The right turn I missed was one that led to Rosebud. Missing Rosebud meant messing with Z’s distaste for lateness.

I had some explaining to do to him, who was most certainly (he’s never, not even for a single minute, late to an engagement) already waiting for me, on why I was a good 10 minutes late in reaching his cousin’s house.

Driving and directions were never my strong suits. I go through a great deal of exertion and effort just to figure out how to get from point A to point B.

Before I even dare to traverse an unfamiliar route, I have to be able to see it on a map and visualize going traveling through each alley and highway.

Still I make a fool of myself more often than not.

Perhaps I shouldn’t plan too much. Must I even plan on something as mundane as a driving route?

Switching Lanes

Sunset Tracks CropAt the start of 2011, I made one resolution: to not pile my boxes too high.

I’m happy to report that I’ve managed to get through the year without having to lay out every single move I’m about to make.

I still planned my runs, my meals and my chores, perhaps to keep some sense of order in my life and to keep the volume of my laundry manageable. And yes, I’ve planned what to bring during hikes and weekend trips.

There was, however, one plan that I had made long before last year’s resolution that I truly looked forward to materializing.

Alas, events will surprise you when you least expect them to.

When I came home in July of 2012, my intent was to prepare for to take the GMAT and scout around for MBA programs. Instead, an email exchange with an old friend led me to a new job. Interestingly, the position had been waiting to be filled some six or seven months prior to my application. They thought I was the right person, I figured it was serendipity.

It’s the job that I’ve been hoping to get but seriously doubted the existence of: a bit of engineering, a dash of business and management, an opportunity for travel – mixed in one interestingly challenging bowl.

I haven’t given up on getting my second graduate degree (it seems that I’m incomplete if I stop learning), but I’ve decided to stay in Cebu and pursue studies in town concurrent to work.

Materializing plans, I suppose, is a lot like driving to a destination. Sometimes we have to switch lanes and take a different, unplanned exit.

Equalizing Entropy

Have you ever been in a conversation where you’re wondering when (and wordlessly hoping that) it would end?Entropy

That’s the type of conversation I never have with my youngest brother. Recently, we talked about entropy.

If memory serves me well, entropy is that state where there is disorder. Almost, if not, everything undergoes some form of entropy before coming to some semblance of organization – only to be thrown up into the air again.

Most days, I’m left wishing I had more than one pair of arms (even better, the ability to be in two or more places at once).

Concurrence was never my strong suit. Despite the assertions of any self-proclaimed multitasker, people can’t truly multitask. We are simply incapable of paying attention to more than one thing at a single point in time (there’s a show on National Geographic that explains this). That being my best defense, my writing has suffered tremendously.

My writing has never reached a state of calm – I’ve struggled to finish something, anything.

My mind is here but there.

I have bits and pieces. Incoherent handwritten notes and thoughts, doodles and scribbles – all unfinished. Perhaps the only brilliant thing about them is that they’re all written on a single notebook, which is now pretty ratty after being slightly drenched when a heavy downpour caught me unprepared.

I may need to organize my schedule more closely. Being back in my tropical home country translates to being able to go for a swim, run or bike ride without having to work around the weather. The challenge now is to be able to weave all of that into work, chores, trips and potentially, school.

It’s been a fun year so far – never short of the usual unexpected crests and troughs.

Transitioning back into the lifestyle I grew up in has been a gradual yet exciting exercise. Proof: I’ve somehow found the courage to drive around Cebu roughly a year after I returned.

There will be more Rosebuds I’ll miss and more lanes to switch into. But accepting that entropy is a fact of life (and of quantum physics) is acknowledging that life can be a great adventure.


©Nel 2013

November 30, 2013 | Boston

Side Notes:

[1]This was originally posted in my website, which is currently under repair.

[2]I must make a confession. The piece above has been sitting in the “drafts” section for close to a year. My take-away is that it’s never clever to allow something meant for 2013 to stale well into the last day of said year.


Help me find my way.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s